K and B: A Birth Story

Britney Smitley
Feb 16, 2019
5 min read

I have the privilege of knowing both K and B outside of a doula/client relationship, so it was an honor to help them in their journey leading up to the birth of their newest baby.

K was an easy client, all I had to do leading up to an unmedicated birth was remind her of her power. She did have some self-limiting beliefs, but nothing she didn't overcome with the help of her sweet husband and her God.

It was a joy to be able to pray with and for my clients, because we did share our faith, it wasn't just a traditional supportive role.

What struck me in our initial meetings was how strong both K and B were, but more than that, how protective and supportive B was of K. I knew immediately that I wasn't going to have to carry the load of the emotional support of the birth, because B has done this once before with their first, this time he felt secure in his birthing role.

Leading up to labor, K was really good with letting me know how she was feeling in her body. She had given me a few warning texts the days before that she was experiencing some contractions, when I received a call at 3:23 am the morning of 2/7 I was not prepared to hear B. It took me a couple minutes to get my wits about me, and realize that by the tone of his voice that K was in LABOR for real, and it is time!

When I arrived at their home, the atmosphere was still, quiet, peaceful. K and B were sitting on their couch, worship music playing in the background. Both looked so calm. It was evident that they both had been up for a while, labor was pretty far along, K was between contractions and looking a little tense. B was next to her on the couch, rubbing her arm, comforting her.

They gave me a run down of their evening and I watched a couple of her contractions. I assured her that it looks like she is pretty far in her labor and it won't be long before she was going to be holding her newest baby.

I started applying counter pressure in her lower back as B would huddle close near her each contraction and comfort her. He was awesome and quick to be by her side when a contraction would begin, he would sit or kneel in front of her and comfort her with words and physical touch. It was so beautiful to watch them work as a team, and how wonderfully they formed a routine to cope with each building wave that would sweep over K.

B and I would sweep in with each new swell, following K's cues until she said she was ready to go to the hospital.

When we arrived the hospital we forgot the doors stay closed until 5:30 am (we arrived 20 minutes before this time), K insisted that she was okay, so we took a little walk around the building to the Emergency Room entrance. While we walked, we had to stop often for each contraction, I began to notice her body was experiencing powerful waves that I could feel from just applying pressure on her hips. The baby was very close!

During this time it was evident K was extremely uncomfortable, but the walking, I believe, was the last little primer to get her over this last hump. During this time, B was a rock star. He was supporting her each contraction, holding her and telling her she can do it, reminding her of her strength.

When we finally arrived into the room where she would give birth, it was hard for K to focus on her work with her body with so many bodies running around. There was a moment of defeat in her eyes when she heard she was only 6 cm dilated.

She voiced to B and me that she would like an epidural and she can't do it. B reminded her of her plans and what she wanted, he told her so many times how amazing she was through this process. Even in moments she didn't believe it, he did.

It was a flurry of nurses and intake papers and questions. The contrast between home and the hospital were felt for the first few minutes. K had a hard time finding her zone initially, but something happened in those transitional moments, her body was working, and she needed peace... so she retreated inward.

Her eyes closed, she swayed, breathed, and hummed to herself. I was in awe watching her go from overwhelmed and self-doubting, to a total boss.

She requested quiet when she needed it. She shoo'ed prodding hands when she didn't want them. And she took control of HER birthing experience.

An hour since laboring in the parking lot, K's water breaks, the nurses share she is now 8 centimeters dilated and they scramble to get the midwife to the hospital. As soon as the nurses hang up from the phone call, K shares that the baby is descending and she can't stop it.

Immediately nurses surround K and they get her reclined in the bed she's not only 10 cm, but the baby was indeed on their way and there was no one to catch! B and I scramble to her head and she looks to him for comfort. He leans inward and begins talking to her...

I realize their photographer hasn't been contacted so I run to grab my phone and start snapping pictures while also trying to support opposite of B. Once they realized they couldn't keep the baby in, the nurses began to tell K to push, she delivered a beautiful, healthy little girl at 6:41 am on February 7th, into the hands of a labor and delivery nurse. Mom requested that the cord not be cut immediately, so the nursing staff obliged and I began to snap photos with my phone. They took such good care of her, loving on her and telling her how awesome she did.

K was experiencing a pretty powerful endorphin rush immediately after birth and had the shakes. It was super sweet watching one of the nurses swaddle mommy and baby.

K had family that worked in Labor and Delivery, so her cousin was able witness to the birth of the newest family member. It was precious to see them share this moment!

K really ruled the birthing room, and the staff was so supportive of her. I don't think most of us thought that one hour is all it would take to progress, God carried K and B through this experience with so much peace. I am so humbled that I got to witness such a beautiful birth.

Going through this experience with them was an honor, and it was so awe-inspiring to see the love of two people carrying each other through the birthing process. At the end of the day that love is evident in the little life they made together.

When I go to weddings, I love to watch the man's face as his bride comes down the aisle. I get choked up by seeing his eyes light up with the mere sight of her...

This time, I choked up with pride of a beautiful baby born,

and tears fell seeing how a daddy looked at the life he made...

and the one he made the life with.

I know future births I will be watching daddy's face, and like weddings, that will be my favorite part.